Lack of intimacy is quickly overtaking financial burdens as the main reason why a majority of married couples are having their separate ways. The absence of sex among couples does not only diminish the companionship between husband and wife, but in a way it degrades an important aspect of marriage.
Let us not jump into conclusion that your husband or wife is probably cheating on someone else that is why your spouse is losing sexual interest in you. Most sexless marriages exist because it is just that: the couple-even though they love each other so much-no longer have sex with each other.
What should couples do to turn around this marriage into the passionate phase like when you were in the honeymoon period? We hope these suggestions would return the spark in your marriage.
Communication is the key
If you want your sexual relationship to be on a roll, take time to communicate with one another. Tell-and listen-to each other about your expectations, fears, desires, and concerns about your intimacy with your spouse. Remember to keep your communication honest.
Determine your spouse’s sexual style and fuse it with your own
Ask your husband or wife about what he wants whenever you are having sex. Does your spouse view sex as a bond between two spirits, two minds, and two souls; or does he/ she see it as an avenue of experimentation? Whatever it is, tell your spouse how you like your sex as well. Try fusing each other’s likes when being intimate.
Try a different method of sexual style
Another suggestion is to try altering your sexual styles. If you tend to wait for your spouse to make the first move, why not let yourself do the initiative? Your partner would be as nervous as you are while doing this, so be patient and approach this practice as validating, accepting, and supporting yourself in the relationship with your partner.
Bring out the best in yourself when it comes to sex
We are not talking about sexual performance. Bring forth the best in your personality and reach out to the best in your partner, both in and out of the bedroom. Don’t let your scared, angry, or lazy side ruin your marriage.
Sustain that emotional contact even out of bed
Some couples convert marriage into companionship after many years of being together. This sometimes makes sex an awkward moment for both of you.
Try to be intimate with her even outside the bedroom. Stare at your spouse lustfully like you used to, or hold your partner by the shoulders (or by the waist) while he or she is working at home.
Try hugging your partner until you are comfortable with each other
Try giving your partner a hug, keeping yourselves in balance and your bodies close to each other. Close your eyes, feel relaxed, and don’t forget to breathe.
Feelings would surface in this simple hug: how you feel about your spouse, about the relationship, and about yourself. There would be resistances and hesitations, but don’t give in to them. Try this tip several times a week and observe the improvement between the two of you.
Make eye contact in bed
Lie on your side in the bed, facing your partner. Put your heads on each other’s pillows, keeping distance so you won’t be looking at a Cyclops. Relax and look at each other’s eyes. If you feel the urge to touch your partner, do so on the face or on the hand.
Don’t rush into the genitals or buttocks until both of you can reach a relaxed connection. Try running this moment of touching into a moment of further intimacy like foreplay and eventually intercourse. This is not to arouse each other, rather to establish a spirited collaborative alliance with each other.