Is It OK to Tell Your Spouse You Are Attracted To Someone Else?

It happens a lot among married couples. You are about to have a nice dinner with your husband at a very fancy restaurant when a really good-looking waiter approaches to take your order. You told him what you want and as he leaves, you couldn’t help but wonder whether to tell your husband, “That waiter looks cute,” or just keep it to yourself.

Emily Goulet, a marriage columnist on Bridal Bulletin, wrote about a friend who underwent the same dilemma. The friend (whom we’ll call “Anne” for convenience), along with her husband and her parents, went out to drink at a local bar when she and her mother noticed that the owner looks “really, really good-looking.”

The mother tells Anne that the bar owner would be perfect for her sister. Anne gawked a bit and as she turned her eyes away from the good-looking fellow, her husband raised his eyebrows and asked, “Seriously, babe? I mean, could you be any more obvious?”

Anne could not believe that her husband looked a “little bit hurt” about the situation, but should she worry? Should married couples not admit they find other people attractive? She sought the advice of a friend of hers, who told the writer not to worry one bit.

“Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you can’t think other people are good-looking,” Anne’s friend said to her. “In fact, I think anyone who has a normal, healthy relationship should be able to comment on whether they think members of the opposite sex are attractive. I mean, what are you gonna do, leave him for the random hot guy on the sidewalk? Come on.”

Confidence and trust in each other is vital in marriage. It keeps away the jealousy and suspicion that your spouse might be cheating, even though it is all in your head. You may find an actor you see on TV really hot, while your husband has a favorite Victoria’s Secret model. It is okay to admit that you find them attractive, just as long as it does not border into obsession.

However, if–for instance–you know your spouse feels hurt about you admitting you still have a crush over Backstreet Boys, you may have to keep those infatuations to yourself.

Source: The Huffington Post

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