Calling After The First Date

calling a dateDates tend to have two different endings: either you don’t want to see him or her again, or you look forward to see your date as soon as possible. If your date ends with the latter scenario, then try asking for his or her phone number. Take your date home (if you’re a woman, let him hitch a cab for you) and seal the night with a friendly kiss.

But what happens the days after the date? When should you call your new-found friend for another round of dating? Here are some great dating tips that you should follow.

Send a thank you message right after the date – Although calling your date right after you went out together to say thanks is a more personal approach, others consider this as too eager and sometimes puts them off. Instead, try send a text message (or e-mail, if you have the address) at this early stage. Remember to keep it short and sweet.

Guys should wait for two days before calling your date again – Timing is crucial here. Calling too soon and you would give an impression that you are overly keen; too late, however, and your date might think that you are insincere or merely playing games. Once you get to talk to your date, tell her that you had a wonderful time the last you were together, then leave the option open for another date to follow. Women should wait for the guy to call back on this stage.

Do not chat for too long on your first call – Do not appear too needy by talking to your date over the phone for hours. Keep the chat short and simple. After all, you would have a lot of time telephoning with your date after your second or third date.

Know what you are going to say – Do not let your nerves overpower you when talking to your date. If you have to, try practicing what you are going to say beforehand.

Smile while talking – Even if your date doesn’t see you, she would definitely appreciate if you are talking with a happy grin as it would come across the phone line. You could try seeing the difference between talking with or without a smile.

Too much answering machine messages is not a good sign – If you are getting repeated messages from your date’s answering machine, chances are the feelings between each other are not mutual. If this happens, try leaving your message—together with your phone number—only once. Your date would call she is likewise interested.

Too much calls from your date is not a good sign either – It displays an impression that your date is clinging too much. Being needy is unattractive as it shows signs of insecurity. Remember that dating on its initial stages should be relaxed and casual.

Avoid text messaging your date as much as possible – Sending messages through your mobile phone are fun and convenient, but is easily misinterpreted (especially with all the innovative jargon associated with texting).

Never wait by the phone – Do not stay home and anticipate whether or not your date would call back. You have your own life to enjoy. If someone is going to call you, they will. At the same time, do not leave messages if ever your date doesn’t call. Just keep on living your busy life and give dating another try.

Excuses are rarely true – Your date might not have called because he or she is away on a business trip, for instance. However, excuses are not true all the time. If someone wants to reach you by the phone, they would have gone through hell or high water just to do so. If you hear an excuse such as “I tried to call you, but…”, then it is time to move on to another date.

Keep your expectations realistically low – Pleasant surprises are far better than defeated expectations. If the phone rings, let them leave a message and respond as soon as you are ready to call back.

Keep your promises to call back – If you said you call, do so, even if it is to let them down gently. Expecting a call that never comes is a worst thing that you can do to someone as it wastes their time and hurts them emotionally.


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