Does the person you love…
• constantly keep track of your time?
• act jealous and possessive?
• accuse you of being unfaithful or flirting?
• discourage your relationships with friends and family?
• prevent or discourage you from working, interacting with friends or attending school?
• constantly criticize or belittle you?
• control all finances and force you to account for what you spend? (Reasonable cooperative budgeting excepted.)
• humiliate you in front of others? (Including “jokes” at your expense.)
• destroy or take your personal property or sentimental items?
• have affairs?
• threaten to hurt you, your children or pets? Threaten to use a weapon?
• push, hit, slap, punch, kick, or bite you or your children?
• force you to have sex against your will, or demand sexual acts you are uncomfortable with?
I have personally experienced abusive relationships more than once. The first one, was with a man who controlled everything I did, he allowed me to have relationships with my family but did not allow many friends. Throughout the relationship, he controlled everything about me. It started out with he just loved me so much that he was scared he was going to loose me, this being his excuse for anytime he manhandled me or cursed me into submission. I became such a different person, and didn’t even notice it. The only thing that I knew was I had to live my life in a manner to keep him from going nuts. It was horrible. Thankfully I got to my senses, because there was one thing that I knew to never accept and that is a man cheating on me. So I got out of it and felt freedom that I lost with him and started to see all that was so wrong with that relationship.
The other relationship that was abusive, was with a boyfriend who put me down and everything I believed in. I was not sure what he was doing because he would also counter act it with how in love he was with me. It didn’t make sense! That relationship finally ended and I am so happy that I escaped that relationship as well.
When I say that I have been through a lot, I really mean it. I have had enough relationships and enough experiences to teach others how to see the signs before getting in too deep. Girls and Boys look at that list and pay attention. Abuse not only hurts but it steals the very you that is so valuable. Never let anyone control or abuse you. Your life is worth more than any lover,and if your lover is doing anything that would make you feel less valued or taking away relationships that are valuable to you then they do not deserve to share your life with you. Ultimately you want someone who loves exactly who you are and has no agenda to rule over your life.